Month: December 2015

A 48-year-old woman goes to see a breast surgeon. She has four lumps in her breasts, a large ulcerated mass and cancer that has spread to her lymph nodes. She says she had not come in earlier because it didn’t seem so important.

A 36-year-old woman sees her dermatologist for an irritated nipple. The doctor palpates a tumor the size of a golf ball and immediately sends her to a breast surgeon. The patient returns to the dermatologist a month later for the same condition. The doctor, shocked to see that she has not had surgery, asks if she had seen the surgeon. The woman says she was concerned about the level of kashrut at the hospital to which she was sent and, upon her rabbi’s advice, was waiting to have surgery at another hospital with stricter kashrut. She dies not long after.

A mother of seven is fully aware that she has a gene that makes it very likely she will contract the cancer that killed her mother and sister. She knows that if she has her breasts and reproductive organs removed, it could save her life. But she refuses. Not because she wants more children, not because she is afraid of surgery, but because she is afraid that if the neighbors find out, it will ruin her daughters’ chances for a shidduch (match). After failing to convince her that she could have the surgery with no one knowing, her doctor puts her in touch with a woman who has had the surgery and reconstruction undetected by her community. She finally agrees.

These stories seem very hard to believe. But imagine that you had heard almost nothing about breast cancer, that it was something not spoken about.

Imagine that you did not know the statistics and had never seen the pink ribbons, heard the calls for self-examinations or witnessed the marathons to raise money for a cure.

Would you know that cancer was lethal? Would you know that early detection was key to survival? Would you understand that talking about it could literally save lives? And even if you did know, suppose you also knew that if anyone was aware you were ill, your daughters’ chances for a good marriage could be significantly lowered (a terrible fate in your community)? Three major studies in the past decade have revealed that haredi women have fewer incidences of breast cancer, but that more of them die from the disease than women in the general population.

Read more in the Jerusalem Post 

Shoshanna Keats Jaskoll

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]Dozens of people on my Facebook feed are sharing this meme today from a page called Unchain My Heart. I’d like to relay a conversation I had with Rabbi Jeremy Stern of Organization for the Resolution of Agunot (ORA) regarding Blu Greenberg’s famous criticism of the rabbinic failure to solve the agunah problem, saying that “If there’s a rabbinic will, there’s a halachic way” and how this relates to the halachic prenup.

Meme from the Facebook group “Unchain My Heart”

Rabbi Stern explained that in all these cases where we circumvent the consequences of a mitzvah de’oraita (such as mechirat chametz, pruzbol, various eruvin, etc), the “loophole” must be set in motion before the mitzvah begins to take effect. You can’t enact a pruzbol after shmitta has begun and you can’t sell your chametz once it’s already Pesach. Why?

Because in all these cases, we are not changing halacha; rather, we are changing reality so that a different set of halachot apply.

This is how the Halachic Prenup works. The prenup does not force the mitzvah of giving of a get; rather it amplifies the mitzvah of spousal support during a marriage. That is why the prenup must be signed before the wedding (or during the marriage as a post-nup). Once divorce proceedings have begun, absent a prenup, there is very little one can do on a halachic front in cases of get refusal. This is why ORA pushes so strongly for prenups. It’s much easier to prevent a disaster than to pick up the pieces. (Here ends the extent of the conversation with Rabbi Stern.)

There are, however, halachic mechanisms that do exist after the fact. These include annulments, invocation of mekach ta’ut, omdana d’mokhach and others (there is also the route of eschewing kinyan in kiddushin altogether, but that is a longer conversation). Obviously, these halachic mechanisms can only be used when the situation warrants it. The problem is when the situation warrants it but we worry more about slippery slopes, political criticism, loss of authority, conceding to feminists or the defeatist contention that “it’s just not done.”

But it has been done, it is being done and it will be done. Yes, we need courageous rabbis and dayanim to step up to the plate. But what we can do as a community is to create the social awareness to cultivate an environment that is receptive and conducive to these decisions. Without the proper social atmosphere, even the best ideas and most constructive policies will have little impact on the ground.

Within the Jewish community, so much of social policy is shaped not by imposing legislation from the outside but by shifting communal norms from the inside. Especially in Israel, many people mistakenly conflate religious institutions and religious authority figures with religion itself, and are therefore hesitant to criticize injustices committed in their name. Out of reverence for Torah and tradition, people inadvertently stand by while that very Torah and tradition they hold so dear becomes a mockery and even a tool of oppression.

This is where we, as a community, step in and say, it doesn’t have to be this way.

We have more power than we think. Let’s use it.

 

–Rachel Stomel[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row]

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